Wading In

A jury ruled against the Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kansas and ordered them to pay nearly $11 million to the family of a soldier killed in Iraq for protesting his funeral. These sick bastards at this church have made headlines for years picketing the funerals of homosexuals holding up signs saying "God Hates Fags" and telling family members that their loved one is burning in hell. In recent years, they started protesting the funerals of U.S. military personnel killed in Iraq and Afghanistan because, in their twisted minds, these soldiers shouldn't be fighting for this gay nation. The Rev. Fred Phelps who heads this "church" says God is punishing this nation for our sins. What kind of sickos could protest someone's funeral? Who could do something like that? At a time when a family is hurting and grieving, these cretins show up with the most disgusting signs and pour salt in their wounds. Phelps says this is a free speech issue. Give me a break. If you...

Parents who care are tough By Kelvin Wade | | October 24, 2007 16:57 Bill Cosby has a new book co-written with Dr. Alvin Poussaint, professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School called 'Come On People: On the Path from Victims to Victors.' Cosby has been an outspoken advocate of better parenting, especially in the black community. On a recent episode of NBC's Meet the Press, Cosby mentioned a minister friend of his who'd done time in prison. The minister said from time to time the guard would shake down the cells searching for weapons and contraband. He said that parents need to do the same with their children's rooms to find out what they're up to. My mother implemented just such a policy. When I was a teen in one of my drawers, hidden beneath disheveled clothing sat two bottles of wine, a few cans of beer and packs of cigarettes. Imagine my horror when I went to retrieve my secret stash one day and found empty bottles of wine, empty beer...

I was leaving Target today just about to get into my vehicle when a dark colored SUV cruised up alongside me. The guy behind the wheel said, "Hey man, you want to buy a home theater system? It's an 800 watt, $1900 system from Magnolia. I had two of them. I hooked up one for myself and I'm selling the other. Make me an offer!" Now what about me identifies me as a potential customer for this guy? I mean, do I look like a thug? I was wearing my "BIG BOSS MAN" shirt and an Oakland Raider hat. Were those the signs that I'd be game for a parking lot electronics sale? This could have easily been that familiar scam where someone is selling a box full of bricks, looking to rip off unwitting marks. But come on, who'd pick ME as a mark? If you haven't met me, then maybe you don't know where I'm coming from. This guy certainly wouldn't have risked a beat down to sell me a box of rocks. So I have to believe he had a legit (well...legitimately stol...

Printed on: Thu, Oct 18, 2007 A dim view of the future By Kelvin Wade I'm old. I'm not Jurassic and not quite as old as dirt but I've been around. This week I turned 41. The thing that rubbed my nose in the fact that I'm no spring chicken has been my failing vision. I needed to renew my driver's license and since I'd done it twice by mail, I had to go into the DMV and take an eye exam. I'd been dreading it. The photo on my driver's license is so dated, I might as well be sporting a dashiki and big ol' Angela Davis afro in it. Plus, I don't even think the weight was accurate at the time I first put that lowball number on there. My vision had gone south since my last renewal and I had doubts about passing the eye exam. But like Seinfeld's George Costanza, I believed I could squint down to at least 20/30 vision. Like it or not, I decided to first visit an optometrist for glasses before the DMV eye chart showdown. I knew I w...

Forty one years old today. Who knew I would live this long? It's like a friggin' miracle. Thank God. I can't complain. I can't complain. I got it good.

Printed on: Thu, Oct 11, 2007 Donations are part of politics By Kelvin Wade "If you can't drink a lobbyist's whiskey, take his money, sleep with his women and still vote against him in the morning, you don't belong in politics." -Jesse Unruh The late and former California Assembly Speaker Jesse Unruh knew what it took to be a successful politician. I'm reminded of the above aphorism when I think about the hubbub over Fairfield City Council candidate Chuck Timm's fundraising prowess. Timm has raised more than $100,000. Two of his opponents, Councilman Jack Batson and businessman Steve Kays, and an apparent letter-writing campaign have called into question the large donations Timm has received from MV Transportation and the police union, both having business before the city next year. The question is fair enough. Large sums of money traditionally buy access. Phone calls from a large donor are going to be returned faster than a call from...

Printed on: Thu, Oct 04, 2007 Dumbing down of America By Kelvin Wade We love idiots in America. Whether it's watching "My Name Is Earl" on NBC, a South Carolina beauty pageant contestant explaining America's map problem, young celebrities self-destructing, a moron crying about Britney Spears on YouTube or the president of the United States, we get a kick out of feeling superior to idiots. Yes, the president who once asked, "Is our children learning?" answered it last week in front of New York schoolchildren proclaiming that "childrens do learn." See what I mean? We love it. The problem is we may be at the dawn of the Idiocracy. In case you missed it, "Idiocracy" was a Luke Wilson comedy last year about a future dumbed-down America. What's not so funny is that award-winning director Ken Burns has said he was prompted to make his excellent World War II documentary "The War" because he'd heard that many...

UPDATED June 14, 2011 . My apologies. Mrs. Moy responded via Facebook that she was invited to the White House because her charity donated over 1,000 tons of care packages to our brave men and women in harm's way. A highly commendable and wonderful thing. Catherine has done great work with Move America Forward. She further stated that only fear of arrest by Secret Service prevented her from flinging her undergarments. LOL I want you to read this column by Vacaville Reporter columnist Catherine Moy. This broad evidently contributed a bunch of moolah to the GOP and was invited to the White House. Just look how she gushes over Bush. It's unreal that anyone living in the real world could write the crap she writes. I don't even care if you like the President. Nobody in their right mind would gush like this. You won't believe it. You'll think I'm making it up, but this actually ran in a newspaper. I'm surprised she didn't throw her panties at the man. Face to f...

Tony told me last week he wanted to do something based on last Thursday's column. So here it is: Need a City Council endorsement? Just give me some food By Tony Wade My brother Kelvin's "The Other Side" column last Thursday, which highlighted 21-year-old City Council candidate Matt Garcia's enthusiasm and vision for Fairfield, may have been perceived by many as a nice profile of an up-and-coming local leader. I, however, see it in a different light. To me, it shows how Kelvin's endorsement can be bought with just a "ginormous sandwich" from Joe's Buffet. Now, don't get me wrong; I ain't sayin' I'm any better. I am fully prepared to throw my support behind whoever is willing to give me a free meal, too. In fact, I decided to make it easier for City Council candidates to know up front what sort of publicity can be garnered for filling my ample belly. I came up with a program that is broken up into four plans - each repre...