I NEED AN IPAD MINI

I need an iPad Mini
By Kelvin Wade
From page A2 | October 25, 2012 | Leave Comment

Apple came out with new gadgets and gizmos this week and I feel like a dieter at a buffet.

I’m a tech guy. I love all things electronic. I could spend hours in Best Buy. My significantly better half Cathi thinks I have enough laptops and tablets and gadgets, but what is enough?

When the iPhone 5 came out recently, I instinctively wanted it. I’d had the original iPhone and a fourth-generation iPod Touch. Since then, I’d cheated on Apple with a Blackberry and then an Android phone. Now was my chance to go back to Apple. It was going to be like a tribute to the memory of Steve Jobs.

Of course, Cathi was opposed to me laying out 200 bones on a new phone. So she talked me into getting a nice free Android phone. Free is always good, so I got the Android phone. (Not because I don’t wear the pants in the family. I just like to let Cathi think she runs things. I think.)

Since then, I can’t help but think I’ve made a mistake. Somewhere Siri is calling to me. Whenever an iPhone commercial comes on TV, Cathi looks at me to see if I’m going to say anything. I don’t. My longing sigh says it all.

So this week, when I knew the Apple iPad Mini was coming out, I announced I had to have it. I needed it. Cathi went so far as to have our 7-year-old grandson Vika holler at me across the Sunday dinner table, “You don’t need it, Poppa Jon. You want it.” That’s what I always say to him when he sees some toy he just has to have.

Look around your living room. Human beings don’t need all that much. A roof, clothes, food and protection pretty much round out the list of necessities. Everything else, from your big-screen cable TV with a Blu-ray surround sound system to your laptop to a plush recliner to the art on your walls are all wants. Americans love creature comforts.

The economy depends on people like me buying stuff I don’t need. If folks just bought stuff they needed, well, we’d have the economy we’ve seen the past few years. You need people like me out there buying wants. I’m the reason the employment numbers fall. I’m a job creator!

I realize I need help. There was that night when I was in bed writing on my laptop, playing a game on my iPad and texting on my cellphone that it dawned on me that I might be a technoholic. I’m the guy who drifts to the “electronics” section of the dollar store.

Cathi grew weary with me yapping about the new iPad Mini and she finally gave in. She said, “Go ahead and get the iPad Mini.” Excellent. Anyone who owns an iPad obviously loves the device but it’s a pretty big item to carry around. And you look like an absolute dork taking photos or video with it. A smaller version would give you all the benefits of an iPad in a more portable package. And here I had my sweet Cathi giving me her blessing!

“But you have to give me your iPad,” she added.

Uh . . . um . . . what? Give her my iPad? She knows I refer to my iPad as “my baby.” She knows it’s practically welded to my hand. I have to know where my baby is at all times. And she wants me to just hand it over to her? Just abandon it? Does she know all the things we’ve been through?

I’d given Cathi a Kindle Fire, which she loves. Could she be testing me somehow? Should I just tell her no, that I’m the man of the house and I’ll get whatever I want? If I said something like that, would I need to call the paramedics?

I decided against getting the iPad Mini. It’s hard for me to say but . . . I don’t need it.

But I think it needs me. Peace.

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